Out of my comfort zone

You may wonder what it is like to be alone in a foreign country with only a slight grasp on the language.  I have to tell you, sometimes it is hard.  I am on the shy side an introvert, and some days it takes real effort to make myself go and try to communicate something to someone.  I am nearing the end of my time here, and there is so much more I would like to accomplish.  It is difficult to force myself to summon the effort to try to explain, and then to understand.  Sometimes I don’t!  Sometimes I think I do, but I have misunderstood.  Sometimes I pretend to understand because I think I have gotten the gist of a conversation.  I am writing this because I am trying to help my readers experience Haiti through my experiences here.  Most have been wonderful, but I wouldn’t be completely honest if I didn’t share my difficulties too.

Sometimes, many times, I just don’t understand, and it is not just the language.  I don’t understand why Haitians build fences around everything.  I know, security is an issue but...  I don’t understand how even small children can sit still through a two hour mass.  I don’t understand how Haitians manage water when they must carry it home in order to cook, wash and drink.  I don’t understand how people get by when they don’t have jobs that pay.  Some make money by selling things or growing things, but how do the rest survive?

I am reading a book called Travesty in Haiti: a True Story by Timothy Schwartz.  It is indeed a most distressing book told by someone who worked for an NGO.  It is a story of how, well-intentioned or not, the US and Europe are responsible for many of the problems in Haiti.  What you say?  Impossible?  Aren’t we the most generous country in the world?  Don’t we give so much to countries like Haiti?  Unfortunately, most of this largesse benefits our own agriculture industry but actually hurts Haitian agriculture.  He writes about how we and Europe ship food to Haiti after a hurricane or whatever.  Unfortunately, the food arrives 6 months too late when the Haitian harvest is in.  The food is given to various NGOs (like CARE, CRS and World Vision).  They “monetize” the food by selling it on the market, thus depressing the price of food which actually takes food out of the mouths of farmers.  The NGOs use the money to pay their staff.  The NGOs have known for a long time that this aid is not helpful.  Unfortunately, no one gives money to buy Haitian food which would actually improve food insecurity in the long run.  And this is only one area where our actions have been very detrimental to the Haitian economy.  Haitians have had to remove tariffs on US goods including rice.  Haiti used to produce more than enough rice to feed itself, but US rice, heavily subsidized by the US government, is cheaper than Haitian rice; the Haitian rice industry is nearly dead.  Haiti used to be a leading producer of sugar, but again, our subsidized sugar lobby has managed to clobber Haitian sugar producers.  If you don’t believe me, please read the book.  There is documented evidence of all of this.

As you can see, I am feeling a little blue today.  Hopefully my next post will be more upbeat.  I struggle to remind myself in the words of the prayer of Oscar Romero “I am a worker, not a master Builder”.  All will be well! (I think those are words of Hildegard of Bingen.)